finding-my-bliss

I spoke about the excitement and exhilaration I'd experienced as an 'art student' I haven't had this feeling in a long time but something is happening right now I don't know what it is but the clues are there! I'm feeling a little skittish even, like the synapses in my brain are making new connections, or at least re-establishing old ones that give me the feeling of being alive again after what seems like and eternity of dark days... Whilst my love was on this planet, he wasted very few moments. The days were spent mostly making or repairing things, he was a very down to earth man but said he loved me because, quoting Dylan's words, "of the two sisters I was the 'creative one'".  He always encouraged me to express myself here in Finding my Bliss.  He said he was not creative but I knew differently for music and words were a big part of his life loving to search the internet for lost tunes and lyrics. I would often find him ...

I had a hard time of it as an 'art student'! The course was what they termed 'self-led'. I was thrown in at the deep end, technique instruction was a no no, finding one's own way through research and experimentation was the path to self expression.. This was at the time when Tracey Emin was making her conceptual  Bed Art ! For me there wasn't much in the way of positive encouragement, my work being worthy! The relationship with my tutor Mr Salt was a 'love ~ hate' one, I loved the passion intrigue and excitement he evoked for the 'modern way', but I hated the lack of feedback about my work, the only comment I remember was "this looks awkward".  A number of the students dropped out of the course expecting a more 'traditional' approach, copying the 'masters' etc! I made it my goal to finish the course through sweat, blood and tears, I remember my final comments to the tutors which I can tell you did not go down w...

Sending love & light speeding over vast oceans lifting heavy hearts  Go to ~~> Haiku my Heart Recuerda mi Corazon

You may have noticed a little swirling going on in my latest posts! I had forgotten about the spiraling tool in fotoflexer ~ distort! But yes if fits my mood a kind of swirling.. Most days I am given over to the grief BUT TODAY I notice a little lightness, nay JOY when tapping the keys! I am not sure where all of this is leading me but I am TAKING HEART KNOWING the journey continues with MY LOVE,  he is INTERWOVEN throughout my very BEING AND I am grateful for this ONE BEAUTIFUL but sometimes brutally bewildering LIFE! and yes, I make no apologies for using capitals ! This is  Huge! Break a few  Rules!

My heart's in a spin hurtling towards the unknown tumbling with red leaves... For Haiku my Heart and my beloved Rebecca, springboard to joy, catalyst for courage... Recuerda mi Corazon

Safeguarding my Heart in this Choppy Ocean of Grief . . There are open and raw wounds around my heart, they need attention, I am paying heed to a well know scripture ~ " for all that is to be guarded, safeguard the heart"! Not allowing bitterness to take hold is the work at hand. I have to thank you my sisters in large part for allowing my grief story here in this space, for offering comfort and encouragement through these days, for just being there through this journey gifting me connection in my hours of need. This indeed helps keep the heart open and soft, your words of wisdom and care. This week I start a course of psychotherapy offered to me through the hospice who cared for my love. I have mixed feelings, I went along to one of the group sessions but felt overwhelmed by the tears and sadness of the other grievers, I will try to remain open to what might arise through one to one therapy. Having said that I already know the limitations of what psychothera...

Simply Hanging In ~ . foxy bides her time hanging in there on the rail dreaming of Mr fox A friend asked about self-care, how was I caring for myself? The answer is simple, I look through the lens,  I line up some lusciousness, I click and create a story, I edit, and then sometimes I haiku my story  ~ simply,  syllables,  five seven five! I Haiku my Heart ~ Recuerda mi Corazon